- The people who heard Muhammad's "revelations" thought they sucked, saying, "Find another messenger or change the message."
10:15
- Denying the revelations of Allah is the worst sin imaginable. 10:17
- "Neither dust nor ignominy cometh near their faces."
Muslims will look good in heaven. There'll be no dust on their faces! 10:26
- The Quran is so perfect it could never be invented. Go ahead and try to write a Surah as great as those in the Quran.
10:37-38
- "Allah wrongeth not mankind in aught; but mankind wrong themselves."
Nah, Allah never hurt anyone. Well, he did drown everyone on earth except Noah and his family. And he's going to torture every non-muslim
forever after they die. But other than that (and other cruel stuff like it), what did Allah ever do to anyone?
10:44
- The Pharaoh became a Muslim to avoid being drowned by Allah. 10:90
-
"And We verily did allot unto the Children of Israel a fixed abode."
Really? Then why do modern Muslims object to Jews occupying the land (Israel) that Allah gave them?
10:93
- By the snorting coursers ... Humans are ungrateful to their Lord. 100:1-6
- When the graves are opened, and the secrets of the breasts are revealed, their Lord will know. 100:9-11
- Those whose scales are light will have hungry mothers and will be engulfed by a raging fire. 101:8-11
- While you're still alive, you're distracted by wealth. But you'll find out. 102:1-4
- Allah will show humans hellfire and then he'ill ask them about pleasure. 102:5-7
- Everyone is in a state of loss, except for believers. 103:2-3
- Only religious people help orphans or those in need. 107:1-3
- Allah sent swarms of flying creatures (birds, bats, insects?) that dropped stones on the owners of the elephants.
105:2-4
- Allah created the heavens and earth in six days and set his throne upon water in order to
test people to see who behaved better. 11:7
- A test for those who suspect that Muhammad invented the Quran: compose ten surahs like those in the Quran. (It shouldn't be hard
to do much better than surahs 38, 40,
44, 47, 63,
66, 88, 105,
111, and 114.) 11:13
- "This is the camel of Allah ... touch her not with harm lest a near torment seize you." 11:64
- Allah will fill hell with humans and jinn.
11:119
- Abu Lahab will die. His wealth won't save him. He'll be plunged into a flaming fire. And his wife, the wood carrier,
will have a halter of palm fiber around her neck. 111:1-5
- Allah has no children and is nobody's child. 111:1-3
- "I seek refuge ... from the evil of that which He created." 113:1-2
Allah is the creator of evil. We must try to avoid Allah's evil creations.
- "I seek refuge ... from the evil of darkness." 113:3
(Darkness is evil.)
- I seek refuge in the Lord, King, and God of mankind ... from the sneaking whisperer, who whispers in the hearts of humans and jinn.
114:1-6
- What luck! There's a boy in my waterpail! 12:19
- "If his shirt is torn from before, then she speaketh truth ... if his shirt is torn from behind, then she hath lied."
Stupid tests like this can only be found in the Quran (or the Bible or the Book of Mormon). 12:26-27
- "And Joseph's brethren came and presented themselves before him, and he knew them but they knew him not."
Stupid stories like this can only be found in the Quran (and the Bible). 12:58
- Everyone and everything (and their shadow) bows to Allah twice a day (whether they want to or not).
13:15
- "And Satan saith...."
Satan gives a little speach. 14:22
- "Lo! thou [Muhammad] art indeed a madman!" 15:6
- Allah created the jinn from fire.
15:27
- Allah commanded the angels to worship Adam. They all did except for
Iblis. 15:28-31
- God is pissed at Iblis for not bowing down and worshipping man. But why? Wouldn't this be idolatry?
15:32-33
- Allah sends Iblis to hell for refusing to worship humans and then immediately changes his mind at Iblis' request.
15:34-37
- "He hath cast into the earth firm hills that it quake not with you."
Allah made mountains that that don't shake when you jump up and down. And lots of other stuff, too! 16:15
- "He loveth not the proud."
Allah is too proud to love proud people. 16:23
- "What hath your Lord revealed ? they say: (Mere) fables of the men of old."
Mo's critics were exactly right. What has he revealed? Just a bunch of fables of old (plus a few he made up himself).
16:24
- "And thy Lord inspired the bee, saying ... eat of all fruits."
Allah told bees to eat from all fruits, but decided to eat nectar and pollen instead.
16:68-68
- "Glorified be He Who carried His servant by night from the Inviolable Place of Worship to the Far distant place of
worship the neighbourhood whereof We have blessed."
This verse refers to Muhammad's famous midnight ride on the back of a flying horse (Al-Buraq)
from Mecca to Jerusalem and then to heaven. 17:1
- Allah has prepared a painful doom for those who disbelieve in the Hereafter.
17:10
- How many generations Allah has destroyed since Noah! 17:17
- Allah will destroy every town before the Day of Resurrection.
17:58
- "Whoso is blind here will be blind in the Hereafter, and yet further from the road." 17:72
- Humans and jinn working together could not produce the Quran. 17:88
- The sun rises and sets at particular places on a flat earth. At the westernmost point on earth, the sun sets in a muddy spring.
18:18, 90
- Mary complains to a palm tree about the pains of childbirth. The tree tells her to shake its trunk and ripe dates will
fall. 19:23-25
- Mary, the mother of Jesus, was the sister of Aaron. (Apparently,
Muhammad confused Mary with Miriam.) 19:27-28
- Jesus professes his Islamic faith while still in the cradle, modestly claiming the be a perfect
prophet who will be raised alive when he dies. 19:30-34
- "Idris. Lo! he was a saint, a prophet."
No one knows who the hell Idris is. 19:56
- "Alif. Lam. Mim."
Many surahs start with three Arabic letters. No one knows why. But I have a theory. The mysterious letters (Alif. Lam. Mim.)
are the Quranic equivalent of WTF. 2:1
- "This is the Scripture whereof there is no doubt, a guidance unto those who ward off (evil)."
There is no doubt about this or any other "Scripture". It is false. It wasn't revealed by God and it won't "ward off evil."
2:2
- Those who believe in the unseen things revealed by Muhammad and who are absolutely certain they will survive their own
death are the successful people. You know, the Muslims. 2:3-5
- "Shall we believe as the foolish believe?"
According to the Quran, the answer is, yes. To be truly wise you must believe whatever the foolish believe. 2:13
- Allah especially dislikes people who pretend to believe when they're around Muslims, and then disbelieve when they hang out with devils.
2:14
- "If Allah willed, He could destroy their hearing and their sight. Lo! Allah is able to do all things." 2:20
- "And if ye are in doubt ... then produce a surah of the like thereof."
If you doubt that the truth of the Quran, then try making some stuff up and see how it compares. (Whatever you come up with will be better than the
Quran.) 2:23
- Allah created seven heavens. 2:29
- And He taught Adam all the names."
Allah taught Adam all the names of the plants and animals, which must have taken a while since there are 1.7 million species that are known
today, with probably another 10 million or so that are yet to be discovered. And this only includes those that are alive today. If extinct species
are included (~99%), then Allah must have taught Adam a billion or so names. 2:31a
- Then Allah showed all the animals to the angels, challenging them to guess their names (if they are truthful).
2:31b
- But the angels weren't truthful enough to guess correctly. 2:32
- Then Allah tells Adam to tell the angels the animals' names. So Adam tells them and says, "I know something you
guys don't! Neener-Neener-Neener!" 2:33
- Allah commands the angels to worship Adam. They all do, except for Iblis, who becomes a disbeliever. 2:34
- After the people worshipped a calf, Moses told them to kill themselves. That, he said, would be best for them.
2:54
- Allah struck Moses with lightning and then revived him just so that Moses would thank him for it!
2:55-56
- As you read the Quran you'll notice that many of the Bible's stupidest stories are made even
stupider in the Quran. Take Exodus 17:1-6 for example. In the Bible, Moses strikes a rock and water
comes out for the Israelites to drink. In the Quran, the same thing happens but there are twelve springs that come out of the rock,
one for each tribe of Israel. 2:60
- Allah turned Sabbath-breaking Jews into apes to be despised and hated. All modern Jews are descendants of apes
(or all modern apes are descendants of Sabbath-breaking Jews). 2:65-66
- "Allah told the Jews to sacrifice a bright yellow cow. 2:67-69
- But they weren't sure what cow to kill. All cows pretty much look alike to Jews. 2:67-69
- Somehow they worked it all out, though, and killed a yellow cow. 2:71
- A man was murdered about the same time that the yellow cow was killed. Nobody knew who the murderer was. So Allah told the
people to smite the dead man with a piece of the dead cow. When they did that, the dead man came to life and told everyone who had
murdered him. (I hope I got that right.)2:72-3
- There are rocks which fall down for the fear of Allah."
Are there rocks that fall down laughing at the stupid things Allah says in the Quran? 2:74
- "Little is that which they believe."
At least Allah got that right. There is little in the Quran that is worthy of belief. 2:88
- Pay no attention to the know-nothings that ask Allah for a sign. (Or ask him to say something good, kind, decent,
or reasonable in the Quran.) 2:118a
- Their hearts are all alike (they suck). Allah's revelations are clear to those that already believe that Allah's revelations are clear.
2:118b
- "We take our colour from Allah, and who is better than Allah at colouring."
Muslims were colored by God. "Who is better than Allah at coloring?"
I give up. Who is better at coloring than Allah? 2:138
- Allah guides whoever the hell he wants on a straight path. And once in a while he changes the direction of the path for no
reason whatsoever. 2:142
- Allah changes the holy direction. Originally Muslims prayed toward Jerusalem. But then, for no apparent reason, Allah told
Muhammad to start praying toward a black cube-shaped building in Mecca (the Kaaba). The Kaaba, according to Islamic tradition,
was the first building on earth. Built by Adam and re-built later by Abraham and Ishmael, the Kaaba is the direction that all
Muslims pray toward five times day, and is the holy site that all Muslims are supposed to visit once in their lifetime.
2:143-4
- "Those who disbelieve [are] Deaf, dumb, blind, therefore they have no sense." 2:171
- "There is life for you in retaliation ... that ye may ward off (evil)."
There is life for you in Allah's magic retaliation. It helps to ward off evil. (It works like a rabbit's foot or something.)
2:179
- "Beautified is the life of the world for those who disbelieve;
they make a jest of the believers."
Yes life is beautiful to us unbelievers and we like to laugh at believers! 2:212
- Drinking and gambling are sinful, but useful. Allah isn't sure, but he figures their sinfulness is probably greater than their
usefulness. Just try not to spend too much on either. 2:219a
- If you're wondering how much is too much to spend on drinking and gambling, Allah has the answer for you. Only drink or gamble
away what is superfluous. Allah is Mighty, Wise, Helpful. 2:219b
- Next Allah gets down to the really important things in life. Things we all wonder about from time to time. Like should I marry a
few idolatresses? Is an Islamic concubine better than a really hot Christian woman? Should I refuse to give my daughter to a Jewish man
until he becomes a Muslim? And who should I invite to the Fire anyway? 2:221
- After your divorced wives have reached the end of their 3 month waiting period, you can take them or leave them. Just don't make
Allah a laughing-stock. 2:231
- When a man dies, his wives can't have sex for four months and ten days. After that, if they're not pregnant, it's no sin for
the dead man if his wives have sex again. 2:234
- Allah told thousands of soldiers to die. Then after they died, Allah brought them back to life. 2:243
- Allah asks for a loan, promising to pay us back with interest. Allah straightens and enlarges whatever is bent or small.
2:245
- Then Allah starts with the Bible stories. And, as usual, he gets them all wrong. First he has angels carrying the ark.
2:247
- Allah confuses Saul with Gideon when telling the stupid dog-lapping story of Judges 7:5-7.
2:249
- Abraham argues with a disbeliever by saying, "God makes the sun rise in the east. Make it rise in the west." Which totally
abashed the disbeliever. But the disbeliever should have said, "I make the sun rise in the east. Ask Allah to make it rise in the
west." That would have abashed Abraham and Allah. 2:258
- Allah makes a man "die" for 100 years, and then brings him back to life.
2:259
- To show how he gives life to the dead, Allah tells Abraham to cut up the
bodies of four birds, scatter their remains on four hills, and then call to them. Allah says
that the dead birds will come quickly to Abraham. 2:260
- Allah has the most beautiful names. 20:8
- Moses turns his staff into a serpent. 20:18-20
- The golden (or saffron-colored) calf mooed. 20:88
- "We have revealed it [the Quran] as a Lecture in Arabic."
Then why are there so many non-Arabic words and sources for it? And why would God prefer one language over another? Is he the tribal
god of the Arabs? 20:113
- In Genesis (3:22-24), Adam and Eve are driven out of the Garden of Eden before eating from the "Tree of Life" and thereby becoming
immortal. But here they eat from "the tree of immortality and power" -- yet they don't become immortal or powerful, they become ashamed
of their nakedness. Why? 20:120-1
- Muhammad's critics claimed that his supposed revelations were "muddled dreams" that he made up as he went along. 21:5
- Allah gave judgment and knowledge to Lot. He was a righteous man.
(Genesis 19:7-38) 21:75
- Every person alive at the time of the flood was evil. So Allah drowned them all.
21:77
- "Idris, and Dhu'l-Kifl. All were of the steadfast."
No one knows who these steadfast guys (Idris and
Dhu'l-Kifl)were supposed to be. 21:85
- "O mankind! if ye are in doubt concerning the Resurrection, then lo! We have created you from dust,
then from a drop of seed, then from a clot, then from a little lump of flesh shapely and shapeless, that We may make (it) clear for you."
Oh thanks, Allah. That clears everything up! 22:5
- "Allah ... quickeneth the dead ... Allah will raise those who are in the graves." 22:6-7
- "Successful indeed are the believers." 23:1
- We [Allah] created man from wet earth. 23:12
- "There is a madness in him [Muhammad]." 23:70
- A husband can accuse his wife of adultery with only one witness (himself). But he has to swear five times (so he can count as
four or more separate witnesses in accordance with 24.4). 24:6
- "Obey Allah and obey the messenger." (But mostly the messenger -- Muhammad.) 24:54
- Those who disbelieve say: This is naught but a lie that he hath invented ... And they say: Fables of the men of old. 25:4-5
- "Say: Is that doom better or the Garden of Immortality?" 25:15
- "And (the tribes of) A'ad and Thamud, and the dwellers in Ar-Rass, and many generations in between." 25:38
No one knows anything about any of these people. (But Allah proudly killed them all.)
- "When they see thee (O Muhammad) they treat thee only as a jest (saying): Is this he whom Allah sendeth as a messenger?" 25:41
- Moses turns his staff into a snake and makes his hand turn white. 26:32
- Moses throws his staff down and it swallows the wizards' staffs. 26:45
- Stay away from poets. The erring follow them. 26:224
- With Allah's help, Moses turns his staff into a snake (or a demon). 27:10
- For his second magic trick, Moses turns his hand white (with Allah's help, of course). 27:12
- Solomon was taught the language of birds. 27:16
-
The Jinn and birds fought in Solomon's army. 27:17
- Talking ants! 27:18
- Solomon talks to the ants. 27:19
- Solomon is upset that the hoopee is not among the birds in his army. 27:20
- Solomon says he'll kill the hoopee unless he has a good excuse for his absence. 27:21
- Moses, with Allah's help, turns his staff into a demon (which he then runs away
from) and makes his hand turn white. 28:31-32
- Noah was 950 years old at the time of the flood. [Genesis (7:11) says he was only 600.]
29:14
-
Lot is among the righteous. 29:26-27
- Some scriptures are allegorical and some are not. No one understands the allegorical stuff except for Allah.
3:7
- Allah tells us about a battle between the good guys (the Muslims) and the bad guys (the non-Muslims). One side saw "clearly,
with their very eyes" that the other side had twice as many soldiers. End of story. "Lo! herein verily is a lesson for those who
have eyes." (I guess I don't have eyes.) 3:13
- "If ye love Allah, follow me; Allah will love you and forgive you your sins."
Follow Muhammad and Allah will love your and forgive your sins. Otherwise.... 3:31
- "Obey Allah and the messenger." But mostly the Messenger (Muhammad). 3:32
- Here's a fun story about Allah, Jesus, and magic clay birds.
"Lo! I [Allah] fashion for you [Jesus] out of clay the likeness of a bird, and I breathe into it and it is a bird, by Allah's leave. "
3:49
- "Allah is the best of schemers." 3:54
- "Why then argue ye concerning that whereof ye have no knowledge?"
Don't argue about things that you know nothing about. 3:66
- Why does Allah like Muslims so much? Because they are the best people on earth, they behave themselves, forbid indecency,
and believe in Allah. Allah loves people who believe in him. (Most Non-muslims are "evil-livers.") 3:110
- Muslims are the best people. Most Non-muslims are "evil-livers." 3:110
"Obey Allah and obey the messenger." 3:132
- "Ye will overcome them if ye are (indeed) believers."
(Believers always defeat unbelievers.) 3:139
- Those who retreat while fighting in a holy war are inspired by Satan. 3:155
- "Think not of those, who are slain in the way of Allah, as dead." 3:169-171
- Allah produces creation, then he reproduces it. 30:11
- Allah makes dead people live and live people dead. 30:19
- Allah causes you to die, then he brings you back to life. Can any of his so-called partners do that? 30:40
- Allah quickened the earth after it died. He's the Quickener of the Dead. 30:50
- If we [Allah] sent a wind and colored it yellow, disbelievers still wouldn't believe. 30:51
- Allah coined all kinds of sumulitudes in the Quran. If you showed them a miracle, the disbelievers would say, "You are just tricksters!" 30:58
- Alif. Lam. Mim. These are revelations of the wise Scripture. 31:1-2
- Those who make the Quran the butt of mockery will have a shameful doom. 31:6
- Those who believe and do good works will live in gardens of delight. 31:8
- (Remember) when Luqman said unto his son, when he was exhorting him: O my dear son! Ascribe no partners unto Allah. 31:13
- This is the revelation of no doubt from the Lord of the Worlds. 32:1-2
- They say, "Did he invent it?" No, it's the truth from your Lord. 32:3
- Those who believe and do good works wll go to the garden of repose. 32:19
- The worst thing a person can do is reject Allah's revelations after they've been reminded of them. 32:22
- Allah hasn't made your wives who you claim (to be your mothers) your mothers, nor has he made those who you claim (to be your sons) your sons.
That's just something you say with your mouths. 33:4
- The prophet [Muhammad] is closer to believers than their own selves. And his wives are like their own mothers. 33:6
- Remember when we [Allah] sent a big wind that you couldn't see? 33:9
- And when the hypocrites and those with diseased hearts said, "Allah and his messenger promised us nothing but delusion."
33:12
- Allah makes the deeds of unbelievers fruitless. (And that is easy for Allah.) 33:19
- "In the messenger of Allah [Muhammad] ye have a good example."
What would Muhammad do? 33:21
- The wives of Muhammad will be punished double for lewdness. (And that is easy for Allah.)
33:30
- Allah gave Zeyd to Muhammad in marriage so that all Muslims would know that it's OK to marry your adopted son's ex-wife. 33:37
- "There is no reproach for the Prophet in that which Allah maketh his due."
Allah says that Muhammad (pb&jbuh) can do whatever he damn well pleases. 33:37
- "Muhammad ... is the messenger of Allah and the Seal of the Prophets." 33:40
- "Allah and His angels shower blessings on the Prophet."
Or as the Ash-Shifa puts it:
"Allah and his angels praise and venerate the Prophet." 33:56
- Allah offered the heavens, earth, and hills the the duty of worshiping him, but they were
afraid and refused. So humans got the job instead. 33:72
- Should we believe that dead people will live again? 34:7
- Is he [Muhammad] lying or is he possessed? 34:8
- We [Allah] can make the earth swallow them or make the sky fall on them. 34:9
- We commanded the birds and hills to sing psalms. 34:10
- And we told iron to make coats of armor. 34:11
- We gave Solomon power over the wind, made copper to gush forth, and forced the jinn to work for him. 34:12
- They [the jinn] made for him [Solomon] whatever he wanted: synagogues, statues, basins, and boilers. 34:13
- When Solomon died, he kept standing until a creeping creature chewed through his staff. When he finally fell, the jinn saw that
if they knew the unseen, they wouldn't have kept working after Solomon had died. 34:14
- There was a sign for Sheba: two gardens on the right and left. 34:15
- Do we ever punish anyone except for ingrates? 34:17
- They all followed Satan, except for a group of true believers. 34:20
- The disbelievers say,"We don't believe in the Quran or what came before it." 34:31
- Those who disbelieve say, "This is nothing but lies and magic." 34:43
- There is no madness in your comrade [Muhammad]. 34:46
- Angels have two, three, or four wings. 35:1
- The devil is your enemy. He'll lead you into the fire. 35:6
- Allah created you from dust, then a little fluid. 35:11
- If he wanted, he could get rid of all humans and replace them with something else. That wouldn't be a hard thing for Allah. 35:16-17
- Those who enter the Gardens of Eden will have armlets of gold and silk clothing. 35:33
- Say: Have you seen your partner-gods lately? 35:40
- Ya Sin. By the wise Quran. 36:1
- We [Allah] have put shackles on their necks that reach to their chins to make them stiff-necked. 36:8
- We bring the dead to life. 36:12
- It was but one Shout, and lo! they were extinct. 36:29
- A token unto them is the dead earth. 36:33
- A token unto them is night. 36:37
- The sun runs to its resting place. 36:38
- And we [Allah] have given the moon mansions to live in until she returns like an old shrivelled palm leaf. 36:39
- It isn't the sun's job to overtake the moon, or the night to outstrip the day. They each float in an orbit. 36:40
- It is a token for them that we bear their offspring in a ship. 36:41
- They await but one Shout, which will surprise them while they are disputing. 36:49
- The men in paradise will be happily employed with their wives. 36:55-56
- "Shall we forsake our gods for a mad poet?"
Muhammad's critics thought he was "a mad poet." 37:36
- Those in hell must eat from a tree with the heads of devils, and then drink boiling water.
After that they return to hell. 37:62-68
- When Abraham's son, Ishmael, was old enough to walk, Allah told Abraham in a dream to sacrifice Ishmael. So Abraham asked Ishmael if it'd be OK with him, and Ishmael said, "Sure thing, Dad,
go ahead and kill me for God. I won't even flinch." 37:102
- Jonah was swallowed by a fish. 37:142
- "We would be single-minded slaves of Allah."
Just what the world needs: a few more single-minded slaves of Allah! 37:169
-
David was an excellent slave of Allah.
38:30
- Allah made the wind obey Solomon. 38:34-36
- Job kicked the ground and immediately a spring flowed out. 38:41-2
- "Dhu'l-Kifl ... of the chosen."
No one knows who Dhu-l-Kifl is supposed to be. 38:48
- The angels worshipped humans, except for Iblis, who became one
of the disbelievers. 38:73-4
-
Iblis asks Allah to let him hang around and mislead humans.
Allah allows him to do so, and Iblis leads all humans to hell except for the single-minded slaves.
Allah agrees, and plans to fill hell with Iblis and his followers. 38:79-85
- If Allah wanted a son, he would have created one. 39:4
- He forced the sun and moon into service. 39:5
- He created you from one being, then from that being he made its mate. 39:6
- He made eight kinds of cattle. 39:6
- He created you in the wombs of your mothers, creation after creation, in a threefold gloom. 39:6
- The losers will be those who lose themselves. 39:6
- We [Allah] have made this Quran a lecture in Arabic, conatining no crookedness, to they can happily ward off evil. 39:27
- Inheritance laws: None of this makes sense to me,
but here's a link that explains it all for you.
4:11-12
- "We shall cast him into Fire, and that is ever easy for Allah." 4:30
- Be kind to the slaves "whom your right hands possess." But, of course, if a kind person would set slaves free and wouldn't
have them in the first place. 4:36
- Don't make Satan your imaginary friend. Choose Allah instead! 4:38
- If you get dirty (by touching a woman or something), and can't find any clean water
around at prayer time, you can clean up by rubbing your face and hands in some clean
dirt. 4:43
- Christians and Jews must believe what Allah has revealed to Muhammad or Allah will disfigure their faces or
turn them into apes, as he did the Sabbath-breakers. (See
2:65-66) 4:47
- Virgins (and plenteous shade) await those who enter paradise. 4:57
- "We sent no messenger save that he should be obeyed by Allah's leave." (Obey Muhammad.) 4:64
- Don't worry about dying in battle. Remember the shade and the pure companions. Allah wouldn't hurt the down on a date-stone.
4:77
- If something good happens to you, it is because of Allah. If something bad happens, it's your own damn fault. Heads,
Allah wins; tails, you lose. 4:78-79
- "Whoso obeyeth the messenger hath obeyed Allah, and whoso turneth away: We have not sent thee as a warder over them."
4:80
- "Will they not then ponder on the Qur'an? If it had been from other than Allah they would have found therein much incongruity."
If the Quran was not from Allah its critics would find some mistakes in it.(The Quran filled with mistakes. It is a silly, error-filled book. But even if
the Quran didn't contain a single error, it would not prove that it was from Allah.) 4:82
- "If it had not been for the grace of Allah upon you and His mercy ye would have followed Satan, save a few (of you)."
Most of us would be followers of Satan if it wasn't for Allah. 4:83
- Whoever participates in a good cause, will be rewarded.
Whoever participates in an evil cause, will bear the consequences thereof. (It's not true, but it's a nice thought.)
4:85
- If someone says Hi to you say Hi (or Howdy) back to them. 4:86
- "Who enjoineth almsgiving and kindness and peace-making ... We shall bestow ... a vast reward."
It is good to help the poor and make peace. (But the part about Allah giving you a big reward for doing so is a big lie.)
4:114
- Don't cut cattle's ears and, thereby, change Allah's creation.
(This is interpreted to mean that Muslim men must not shave
their beards, and Muslim women must not pluck their eyebrows.) Allah commands non-Muslims
to shave beards and pluck eyebrows so he can have an excuse to burn them in hell after they die.
4:119-121
- Allah will not allow disbelievers to succeed against believers.
4:141
- Jesus was not crucified. (It just looked like he was.) 4:157-8
- No one argues about Allah's revelations except for disbelievers. 40:4
- The disbelievers say, "You killed us twice and made us live twice." 40:11
- We [Allah] sent Moses to Pharaoh, Haman, and Korah, but they said, "He is a lying sorcerer." 40:23-4
- He it is Who created you from dust, then from a drop (of seed) then from a clot. 40:67
- Thus does Allah send astray the disbelievers (in his guidance). 40:74
- Ha Mim. ... a Lecture in Arabic for people who have knowledge. 41:1-3
- Then Allah said to heaven (when it was smoke) and to the earth, "Come willingly or not." They said, "We're coming." 41:11
- Then Allah made the seven heavens in two days, with lamps. 41:12
- If they turn away, say: "A thunderbolt will destroy you like it did the tribes of A'ad and Thamud." 41:13
- And they'll say to their skins, "Why are you testifying against us?" 41:21
- The disbelievers will say, "Show us the people and jinn who led us astray and we'll put them under our feet." 41:29
- Ha. Mim. A'in. Sin. Qaf. ... We [Allah] have inspired in you [Muhammad] a lecture in Arabic. 42:1-7
- Nothing looks like Allah. 42:11
- Say: I believe in whatever scripture Allah sends down. 42:15
- Allah is gracious to his slaves. 42:19
- If bad stuff happens to you, it's your own fault. 42:30
- When we [Allah] sent Moses with our revealtions and tokens to the Pharaoh, they laughed at them. 43:46-7
- People laughed at the son of Mary, saying, "Is he better than our gods?" 43:57-8
- "O My slaves!... Enter the Garden, ye and your wives." 43:68-70
- Ha. Mim. This is scripture made plain. A lecture in Arabic so you can understand it. 43:1-3
- Ha. Mim. This is scripture made plain. We [Allah] revealed it on a blessed night. 44:1-3
- Watch (Muhammad) for the day when there's smoke in the sky. It will envelope the people. 44:10-11
- "They had turned away from him [Muhammad] and said: a madman?" 44:14
- Those in hell must eat from a tree (the tree of Zaqqum) like molten brass that burns their bellies. Then
boiling water will be poured on their heads. 44:43-48
- Ha. Mim. 46:1
- When our [Allah's] revelations are recited to them, the disbelievers say, "This is mere magic. Did he invent it?"
46:7-8
- We inclined toward thee (Muhammad) certain of the jinn, who wished to hear the Qur'an. 46:20
- If you help Allah, he'll help you. 47:7
- Those who obey Allah will live in a garden with flowing milk that doesn't change its flavor, and with rivers
of delicious wine. 47:15
- Some listen to you (Muhammad), then they leave and say, "What did he say?" 47:16
- Some believers say, "If only a surah were revealed!" 47:20
- Will they then not meditate on the Qur'an, or are there locks on the hearts? 47:24
- Those who swear allegiance to you (Muhammad) swear allegance only to Allah. 48:10
- Allah was well pleased when the believers swore allegiance to thee [Muhammad] beneath the tree. 48:18
- Do not lift your voice when in Muhammad's presence. Those who subdue their voices are righteous and will receive an
immense reward from Allah. 49:1-3
- Those who call you [Muhammad] when you're in your private apartments have no sense. 49:4
- Don't defame or insult one another with nicknames. 49:11
- Would you like to eat the flesh of your dead brother? 49:12
- Would you teach Allah your religion? 49:16
- What not to eat: roadkill, blood, pigs, animals sacrificed to gods other than Allah, animals that were strangled, beat to death,
jumped of a cliff, fell from the sky, or were killed by other animals. 5:3
- "I perfected your religion for you ... and have chosen for you as religion al-Islam." 5:3
- When it's time to pray and you have just used the toilet or touched
a woman, be sure to wash up. If you can't find any water, just rub some dirt on yourself.
5:6
- Jesus has a conversation with a godly unclean spirit named "Legion." 5:8-10
- "O People of the Scripture! Now hath Our messenger come unto you, expounding unto you much of that which ye used to hide in the Scripture."
Muhammad, who was illiterate and who had never read the Hebrew and Christian scriptures, offers to explain the scriptures to Christians and Jews, who he claims hide and distort the true meaning of their scriptures.
5:8-15
- Christians are disbelievers for believing in the divinity of Christ. 5:17
- The Quran repeats the silly story about Cain and Abel (though they are unnamed in the Quran). 5:27-31
- "Allah sent a raven scratching up the ground, to show him how to hide his brother's naked corpse." 5:31
- Allah has turned some Christians and Jews into apes and swine. 5:60
- Allah warns believers not to ask to many questions. (Honest answers will cause them to lose their faith.) 5:101
- Jesus made a bird out of clay that flew away when he blew on it. 5:110
- The disciples of Jesus were muslims! 5:111
- Jesus' disciples ask Jesus to send a table of food down from heaven. And he delivers! 5:112-114
- After agreeing to send down a table of food from heaven, Jesus warns his disciples that will catch holy hell if they ever stop believing.
5:115
- The Christian Trinity is the Father, Mother, and Son. 5:116
- Qaf ... The disbelievers say, "This is a strange thing." 50:1-2
- We [Allah] spread the earth out. That's a reminder for every pentitent slave. 50:7-8
- Were we worn out by the first creation? Then why would we be worn out by the second? 50:15
- We're closer to humans than their juglar veins. 50:16
- I'm not a tyrant to my obedient slaves. 50:29
- On that day, Allah will say to hell, "Are you filled?" And hell will answer, "is there more to come? 50:30
- he earth will split. That'll be easy for us to do. 50:44
- Those that winnow with a winnowing 51:1
- Abraham's wife moaned, smote her face, and cried out: I'm a barren old woman! 51:29
- Allah created the jinn to worship him. 51:569
- Allah doesn't ask people or jinn to feed me or give me money. 51:57
- Heaven will heave with awful heaving. And the mountains will move with awful movement. 52:9-10
- Those in the garden will be happy because they're not tormented with hell-fire. 52:18
- The men in the garden will recline on couches, and Allah will wed them to maidens with wide, lovely eyes. 52:20
- Thei seed of the men in the garden will join them there. 52:21
- The men in the garden will be waited on by menservants, who are like hidden pearls. 52:24
- Tell them, Muhammad, that you are neither a soothsayer nor a madman. 52:29
- Let them try to produce a speech like the Quran. 52:34
- Allah tells Muhammad to ask his critics if they have a stairway to heaven. 52:38
- Do they have a stairway to heaven? Or does he [Allah] have daughters whereas you have sons? 52:38
- If they saw the sky fall, they'd say it was clouds. 52:44
- By the star when it sets, your comrade [Muhammad] never makes a mistake and is never deceived. 53:1-2
- Muhammad doesn't speak because he wants to speak. 53:3-4
- Muhammad is inspired by an inspiration from a vigorous, mighty power that appeared on the horizon. 53:5-7
- He came to within two bow's lengths. And he revealed to his slave [Muhammad] what he revealed. 53:9-10
- Muhammad's not lying about what he saw. Are you going to argue with him? 53:11-12
- Muhammad saw him again once by the lote-tree, which grows in the Gardon of Abode. 53:13-14
- Have you thought about Al-Lat, Al-'Uzza, and Manat lately? 53:19-20
- Are yours males and his females? 53:21
- Those who disbelieve in the hereafter have female angels. 53:27
- He [Allah?] is the Lord of Sirius. 53:49
- This is a warner of the old-time warners. 53:56
- The threatened hour is coming soon. 53:57
- Muhammaed split the moon into two pieces. Beat that one, Jesus! 54:1-2
- Noah's folk deniedAllah's slave and said, "He's a madman." 54:9
- Allah carried Noah on a thing of planks and nails. We left it as a token, but does anyone remember it? 54:13-15
- Allah made the Quran easy to remember, but does anyone remember it? 54:17
- The tribe of A'ad rejected Allah's warnings. So he blew them all away like they were uprooted palm tree trunks. 54:18-20
- Allah made the Quran easy to remember, but does anyone remember it? 54:22
- Allah sent one shout, and they became like dry twigs. 54:31
- Allah made the Quran easy to remember, but does anyone remember it? 54:32
- Allah made the Quran easy to remember, but does anyone remember it? 54:40
- Are your disbelievers better than Pharaoh's? 54:43
- The Beneficent [Allah?] revealed the Quran and created things. 55:1-12
-
Which is it, of the favours of your Lord, that ye deny? 55:13
This question is repeated 31 times in this chapter.
Here is my answer to it: All of them. (I'm only going to say that one time.)
- Allah created man from clay. 55:14
- Allah created he jinn out of smokeless fire. 55:15
- Allah is Lord of the two easts and two wests! 55:17
- He has let loose the two seas. There's a barrier betwen them, so they don't meet. 55:19-20
- We'll dispose of you, humans and jinn. 55:31
- Hhumans and jinn won't be able to penetrate all regions of heaven and earth without Allah's approval. 55:33
- Fire and brass will be sent against you. And you won't escape. 55:35
- Some day the heaven will split and turn a rosy-red color. 55:37
- The guilty will be known by their marks, and will be taken by their forlocks or their feet. 55:41
- Allah will give those in the Garden women of modest gaze whom neither man nor jinni have touched. 55:56-57,
55:70-74
- When the event happens, the earth will shake with a shock, and the hills will be ground to powder. 56:1-5
- There will be three kinds of people: those on the right hand, those on the left hand, and the foremost. 56:7-10
- The foremost group will be brought to gardens of delight, where they'll be waited on my immortal youths and fair ones with wide, lovely eyes,
like hidden pearls. 56:11-23
- For the group on the right, Allah has created new virgins to be their lovers and friends. 56:27-37
- Those on the left hand, will endure scorching wind and scalding water (that is neither cool nor refreshing). 56:41-44
- This is a noble Quran. A hidden book which only purified people can touch. A revelation fro the lord of the worlds. 56:77-80
- If you're on the right hand, you get the garden of delight. But those who reject or make mistakes will be welcomed with boiling water
and roasted in hell. That's a certain truth. 56:92-95
- Allah created the heavens and earth in six days. Then he mounted the throne. 57:4
- Why don't you spend your money for Allah?. 57:10a
- Those who spend and fight for Allah are better than the others. 57:10b
- If you lend money to Allah, he'll double it and give you a rich reward.57:11
- The life of the world is only play and illusion. 57:20
- We [Allah] make every disaster on earth or in your life happen. Lo! That is easy for Allah.57:22
- Obey Allah and have faith in his messenger [Muhammad]. If you do, Allah will give you a double reward.57:28
- Allah has heard the words of the woman who argued with you (Muhammad) about her husband. She has complained to Allah,
and Allah heard your conversation. Allah hears things. 58:1
- Those of you who divorce your wives by saying they are like their mothers are wrong. They aren't like your mothers.
58:2
- A man who remarries a wife (whom he previously divorced by saying she was like his mother) must free a slave before he touches her again.
Allah knows what you're doing. 58:3
- If a man doesn't have the wherewithall to own a slave must fast for two months before touching his former wife. If he can't do
the fast, he must feed sixty poor people. 58:4
- Someday Allah will raise the dead and tell them what they did. Allah keeps an account and remembers (even after everyone else has forgotten).
58:6
- Allah is attends every meeting. 58:7
- Conspiracies are inspired by the devil to vex believers. 58:10
- They are the devil's party. Won't the devil's party be losers? 58:19
- If Allah had causd the Quran to descend on a mountain, you [Muhammad] would have seen it torn apart by the fear of Allah.
We make these parables so people can reflect. 59:21
- Allah has the most beautiful names. 59:24
- "See they not how many a generation We destroyed?"
How could they (or anyone else who wasn't there) see Allah destroy previous generations? 6:6
- True enough. There isn't a book, prophet, or angel that would have caused skeptics to believe the foolish things in Islam or Christianity.
6:7-9
- Pets are people, too! 6:38
- Allah guided Noah,
David,
Elisha, and
Lot on a good and righteous path.
6:84-87
- Allah created the jinn but he is not in partnership with them. 6:100
- Allah appointed jinns to be the adversaries of prophets. 6:112
- Jinns have led many humans astray. 6:128
- The jinn were disbelievers. 6:130
- "And of the cattle (He produceth) some for burdens, some for food. Eat of that which Allah hath bestowed upon you, and follow not the
footsteps of the devil."
The devil is a vegetarian. Kill and eat lots of animals so you won't be like him. 6:142
- Oh Prophet [Muhammad], if any believing women come to you, promise to obey you, don't say Allah has any partners,
don't steal, commit adultery, or kill their children, or lie about things they've devised between their hands and feet,
then go ahead and accept them. 60:13
- Rememember when Moses said to his people, "Why are you persecuting me when you know I'm Allah's messenger?" 61:5
- So when they went astray Allah sent their hearts astray. 61:5
- And when Jesus said, "I'm Allah's messenger ... bringing good tidings of a messenger who comes after me, whose name is the Praised One.
But the people said, "This is mere magic." 61:6
- Who doeth greater wrong than he who inventeth a lie against Allah? 61:7
- Be Allah's helpers, like Jesus said to his disciples: "Who are my helpers for Allah?"
His disciples said: "We are Allah's helpers." 61:14
- Allah sent an illiterate messenger [Muhammad] to recite his revelations to illiterate people. 62:1-2
- A hypocritical Jew looks like an ass carrying books. Those who deny the revelations of Allah are ugly. 62:5
- Say (Muhammad): "You Jews claim to be favored by Allah. Then you should want to die." But the Jews don't want to die.
62:6-7
- Say (to the Jews, Muhammad): "You will die and God will tell you what you did." 62:8
-
When the hypocrites come to you (Muhammad), they say" You are Allah's messenger." But Allah knows they are lying.
63:1
So Muhammad isn't Allah's messenger?
- They believed, then disbelieved, therefore their hearts are sealed so that they understand not. 63:3
- How they are perverted! 63:4
- Allah created all of you, but one of you is a disbeliever and one is a believer. 64:1-2
- Did you hear the story about the disbelievers that tasted the ill-effects of their conduct? 64:5
- Those who disbelieve say that won't be rasied from the dead. Say to them (Muhammad), "Yes you will, and then you'll be told what you did."
That's easy for Allah to do. 64:7
- When Allah gaters you on the day of assembling, it will be a day of mutual dissilusion.64:9
- Your wives and children are you enemies. 64:14
- Your children are only a temptation. 64:15
- So do your duty to Allah. Obey and spend.64:16
- Make Allah a big loan. He'll pay you back double. 64:17
- "Allah it is who hath created seven heavens, and of the earth the like thereof." 65:12
No one knows where these seven heavens are or what they're supposed to be.
- Oh prophet [Muhammad]! Why do you ban that which Allah has made lawful for you by seeking to please your wives? 66:1
- Allah has made it lawful for you (Muslims) to break your oaths. 66:2
- If Muhammad divorces you, his Lord [Allah] will give him more wives that are better than you. 66:5
- The wives of Noah and Lot (who were both righteous) betrayed their husbands and are now in the Fire. 66:10
- And Mary, 'Imran's daughter, was chaste, so we breathed some of our spirit into her. 66:12
- Allah created seven heavens. Can you see any cracks in them? 67:3
- Allah made the stars as missiles to throw at devils. 67:5
- Do you think you are safe from him so he won't cause the earth to swallow you? Or let loose on you a hurricane?
67:16-17
- Say: If all the water disappears on earth, who will bring your water? 67:30
- Allah assures Muhammad that he is not a madman. 68:2
- "Thou [Muhammad] art of a tremendous nature."
What would Muhammad do? 68:4
- When our [Allah's] revelations are recited to him, he says: "They are merely old fables." 68:15
- We will brand him on the nose. 68:16
- When disbelievers hear the Quran, they roll their eyes and say "he [Muhammad] is indeed mad." 68:51
- The reality! What is reality? 69:1-2
- Allah sent the wind for eight days and seven nights on the tribe of A'ad, until they were all dead like hollow trunks of palm trees.
Then he asked Muhammad, "Can you see any remnant of them?" 69:6-8
- Pharaoh and his people disobeyed the messenger, therefore did Allah gripped them with a tightening grip. 69:9-10
- Allah carried Muhammad on Noah's ship during the flood. 69:11
- When the trumpet blasts, the earth and mountains will be crushed with one crash. 69:13-14
- On that day the event will happen, and heaven will split in two. 69:15-16
- Eight angels will hold up the throne of your Lord. 69:17
- Those whose book is in his [Allah's] right hand will go to a garden with lots of grapes. 69:19-23
- Those whose book is in his left hand, will say: "Oh, I wish I hadn't been given my book." 69:25
- This is a revelation from the Lord of the Worlds. 69:43
- Lo! it is absolute truth. 69:51
- Allah commanded the angels to worship Adam. They all did
except for Iblis. 7:11
- Adam and his nameles wife (Eve?) didn't know they were naked until they ate from the tree. 7:22
- Entire nations of the jinn have been tormented with fire.
(Since jinns were made from fire, they'll probably enjoy the fire of hell.) 7:38
- Muslim commentators on the Quran tell us that Salih, through the power of Allah, turned a stone into a
female camel. 7:73
- "Then he [Moses] flung down his staff and lo! it was a serpent." 7:107
- "And he [Moses] drew forth his hand (from his bosom), and lo! it was white." 7:108
- We inspired Moses (saying): Throw thy staff! And lo! it swallowed up their lying show. 7:117
- "So We sent against them the flood and the locusts and the vermin and the frogs and the blood - a succession of clear signs."
7:133
- When Allah revealed himself to Moses, the mountain (Mt. Sinai?) came crashing down. 7:143
- The golden calf mooed. 7:148
- "The Prophet who can neither read nor write." 7:157-8
- The Quran repeats (and embellishes somewhat) the absurdities of the Biblical Exodus. 7:160
- Allah presented the Jews a big fish on the Sabbath day when they were forbidden to fish, and then withheld the fish on the day that they were
permitted to fish. That'll teach them! 7:163
- Allah turns humans into apes! 7:166
- Those who deny Muhammad's revelations are like dogs. 7:176
- "We lead them .. I give them ... He is but a"
If the Quran is such a perfect book, why can't Allah keep his pronouns straight? 7:182-4
- Allah, Lord of the Ascending Stairways 70:3
- For the angels and the Spirit [1] ascending to him, a day is like 50,000 years. 70:3-4
- On that day the skey will become molten copper, and the hills like flakes of wool. 70:8-9
- I swear by the Lord of the rising and setting places of the planets that we are able to replace them by others who are better than them.
70:40-41
- Allah sent Noah to the people, saying to him: "Warn the people of the painful doom that is coming to them."
So Noah said to them: "I am a plain warner to you. Serve Allah and obey me." 71:1-3
- Noah said to Allah, "I've warned the people night and day. But it just adds to their repugnance. They stick their fingers in their ears
and cover themselves with their clothes. 71:5-7
- Allah created the seven heavens. And made the moon for a light and the sun for a lamp. 71:15-16
- Say (Muhammd): It is revealed to me that some Jinn said, "We have heard a marvelous Quran. So we believe in it and say that Allah
doesn't have a partner, wife, or son." 72:1-3
- The Jinn who listened to the Quran said, "We looked for heaven, but found it filled with strong warders and meteors.
We used to sit in high places and listen. But now there's a flame waiting for us there. 72:8-9
- Say to them (Muhammad): "I only pray to Allah. I never say he has a partner." 72:20
- On the day with the earth and the hills rock, and the hills become a heap of sand. 73:14
- On the day that turns children's hair grey, heaven will be ripped apart. 73:18
- Your Lord knows how you stay up praying nearly two-thirds of the nigh, or sometimes half or a third.
Allah measures and keeps track of such things. 73:20
- Loan Allah a goodly loan. 73:20
- Allah to Muhammad: Hey you in the cloak. Get up and warn people. Wash your clothes. Avoid pollution. 74:1-5
- Above it are nineteen. We've made their number a stumbling block to disbelievers. 74:30-31
- Has there ever been a time when humans didn't exist? 76:1
If this verse means what I think it means, then the answer is "Yes." The universe has existed for 13.8 billion years;
humans have been around for only the last couple million years - depending on what you consider "human."
- Allah created man from a drop of thickened fluid. 76:2
- No, I swear by resurrection day. 75:1
- No, I swear by the accusing soul that this scripture is true. 75:2
- Do people think we can't assemble their bones? Heck. We can assemble their very fingers! 75:3-4
- They ask, "When will be this resurrection day?" It'll be when the moon is eclipsed, and the sun and moon are united. 75:6-9
- Where is the wizard who can save us? 75:27
- Is he able to bring the dead to life? 75:40
- When the stars are put out, the sky is ripped apart, and the mountains blown away on the day of decision. 77:8-13
- They argue about the awful tidings. But they'll find out soon enough. 78:1-5
- We [Allah] have built above you seven strong heavens. And a dazzling lamp. 78:12-13
- We wrote it all down in a book. 78:29
- Now they say, "Will we be raised from the dead after we are crumbled bones?" Seems unlikely. But they'll be awakened with a single shout.
79:10-14
- "He spread the earth."
That would only be possible on a flat earth. 79:30
- "Obey Allah and obey the messenger, and turn not away from him when ye hear (him speak)." 8:20
- "This [the Quran] is naught but fables of the men of old." 8:30
- "Allah is the best of plotters." 8:31
- Those that live or die in war are a clear proof of Allah's sovereignty. 8:31
- Exhort the believers to fight. They will win easily, because disbelievers are without intelligence. 8:65
- From what thing doth He create him? From a drop of seed. 80:18-19
- Then causeth him to die, and burieth him; Then, when He will, He bringeth him again to life. 80:21-22
- But when the Shout cometh ... On that day faces will be bright as dawn, Laughing, rejoicing at good news. 80:33-39
- Someday, according to the Quran, the sun will be overthrown, the stars will fall, the hills will be moved, and the sky will be torn away.
81:1-14
- Someday the girl that was buried alive is asked for what sin was slain. 81:8-9
- Your comrade [Muhammad?] isn't mad and he shouldn't be stoned. 81:22-25
- Someday heaven will split, the planets scatter, the seas flood, and the graves will be overturned. 82:1-5
- There are guardians above you that record everything you do. 82:10-12
- On the awful day, everyone will stand before the Lord of the Worlds. 83:5-6
- There's a written record of the vile in Sijjin. 83:7-9
But no one knows where Sijjin is.
- Woe to the deniers on that day! 83:7-9
- There's a written record of the righteouse in 'Illiyin. 83:18-20
But no one knows where 'Illiyin is.
- The righteous lounge on couches, drinking wine, mixed with the water of Tasnim. 83:22-25
No one know what Tasnim is. But it's mixed with the wine that the righteous drink in the garden.
- When heaven is split and afraid of her Lord. When the earth is spread out and empty, and afraid of her Lord.
Those in his right hand will will be happy. 84:1-9
- What's wrong with them? Why don't they believe in the Quran and worship Allah? 84:20-21
- The owners of the ditch were destroyed by a fuel-fed fire. 85:4-5
No one knows who the owned the ditch or why they self-destroyed. It's just another mystery of the Quran.
- The Lord of the throne of glory does whatever he wants. 85:15-16
- Did you hear the stories about Pharaoh and the tribe of Thamud? 85:17-18
The Quran asks its readers if they've heard the stories about the Pharaoh and the tribe of Thamud - stories that are repeated
told throughout the Quran. So this answer to this question to anyone who has read the Quran is "Yes - way too many times."
- Disbelievers live in denial. 85:19
- What will tell you about the morning star? 86:2
The answer, of course, is science. The morning star is the planet Venus when it is visable in the morning sky.
- Every human has a guardian over it. 86:4
- Humans are created from a gushing fluid, issued from between the loins and ribs. 86:5-7
Humans are not created from semen alone, but from fertilized eggs. 86:6
- He [Allah] can bring dead people back to life. 86:8
- The Quran is a conclusive word. It's no pleasantry. 86:13-14
- They're plotting a plot (against you, Muhammad). I [Allah] am plotting a plot against them. 86:15-16
- We [Allah] will make you (Muhammad) read, so you won't forget. 87:6
That seems like a good plan. The prophet that Allah chose to create the Quran should know how to read. Allah said he'd make him read,
but he never did. Muhammad died illiterate.
- This is in the former scrolls: the books of Abraham and Moses. 87:18-19
There is very little in the Quran that is in the "former books" (the Hebrew scriptures.) And it's unlikely that Moses (if he existed)
had anything to do with writing the Torah. And Abraham didn't write anything in the "former books."
- "And the earth, how it is spread?" 88:20
If the earth is spread, it must be flat.
- By the dawn and the ten nights, and the even and odd. 89:1-3
No one knows what ten nights are being referred to here. The same is true for "the even and the odd".
- "Allah ... sent down host ye could not see."
Allah sent down angels (I guess) to fight for him! (But they were invisible so no one could see them.) 9:26
- "The Jews say: Ezra is the son of Allah." (Where and when did any Jew ever say that?) 9:30
-
"They have taken as lords ... their rabbis and their monks."
Jews and Christians consider rabbis and monks to be partners with God? How do Muslims treat Muhammad?
9:31
- Don't try to enjoy this life. The fun starts after you die. (If you are a good Muslim, that is.)
9:38
- "Ye cannot harm Him at all." 9:39
-
Invisible armies!
Allah supported Muhammad with armies that no one else could see. 9:40
- Allah created man in an atmosphere. 90:4
- "The sun ... and the moon when she followeth him." 91:1-2
The moon orbits the earth; it doesn't "follow the sun."
- "The earth and Him Who spread it." 91:6
Allah spread the earth out flat like a pancake.
- Allah doesn't hate you. 93:3
- Didn't we dilate your bosom? 94:1
- Allah created humans to be "of best stature" but then reduced them "to the lowest of the low".
Except for "those who believe and do good works."
But what about those who don't believe but do good works? Are they the "lowest of the low"? 95:4-6
- Surah 96 (The Clot) was the first surah revealed to Muhammad. It began with this bit of news: Humans were created from a clot.
96:2
-
The "night of predestination" or the "night of power" is better than 1000 nights.
But no one knows what it means. 97:1-3
- Believers are the best of created beings. 98:7
- At the end of the world, there will be a final earthquake, and all the people, alive and dead, will come forth and be shown
their deeds. 99:1-6
- Ha. Mim. 45:1-6
- Allah liked the Jews more than everyone else. 45:12-22
- You'll see each nation crouching. 45:28
