18 1 David counted the people with him, and set up captains of thousands, and captains of hundreds. 5 He told his captains, "Go easy on Absalom for my sake."
6 So the people went out into the forest to fight Israel. 7 And there was a great slaughter, killing 20,000. 8 The forest devoured more people than the sword.
9 Absalom met David's men while he was riding on a mule. The mule went under an oak tree, and Absalom's head got stuck somewhere between heaven and earth, with the mule going on without him.
10-11 Someone saw Absalom hanging from the oak and told Joab, who went off to find him. 14 When he did, he put three darts through his heart, while he was alive and still hanging from the oak tree.
15 To finish him off, ten young men killed him.
19 Ahimaz said,
Let me run and tell David the good news, that God has avenged him of his enemies.
21 And Joab let him run with Cushi to deliver the news to David.
32 When they arrived, they said to David, "Absalom is dead."
33 David wept, and said,
Oh my son Absalom. I wish I had died for you. Oh Absalom, my son, my son!
19 1 David kept weeping for Absalom, so the victory celebration was turned into mourning.
5 Joab lost patience with David, and said,
You have shamed those who saved your life, and the lives of your family, wives, and concubines.
6 You love your enemies and hate your friends. If Absalom had lived and all of us had died, you'd have been fine with that.
7 Now get up and speak to the people. I swear to God, if you don't, there'll be bloody hell to pay.
8 So David got up and sat in the city gate. All of the people got out of their tents to come see him.
9 Everyone was upset, saying,
David saved us from the Philistines.
But he ran away from his son Absalom.
What's up with that?
11-14 The priests and elders of Judah persuaded David to return to Jerusalem.
15 And the people of Judah came to meet him as he crossed the Jordan.
18 As David crossed, Shimei fell down before David and said,
19Forget what I did and said on the day you left Jerusalem.
20 I know I've sinned.
So I've come here to meet my lord and king.
21 But Abishai said,
Shouldn't Shimei be killed for cursing the Lord's anointed?
20 David answered,
No one will be killed today in Israel.
23 David said to Shimei,
You won't die. Swear to God.
24 Then Jonathan's son, Mephibosheth, came to meet David.
He hadn't dressed his feet, trimmed his beard, or washed his clothes since the day David ran away from Jerusalem.
26-27 Mephibosheth said to David,
You are an angel of God. Do whatever you'd like with me.
28 You have killed all of Saul's family, but you saved me and let me eat at your table. So I have nothing to cry about.
29 David said to him,
Why are you talking about any of this?
I have said, "You and Ziba will divide Saul's land."
30 Mephibosheth said, "Let Ziba have it all."
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The Skeptic's Annotated Bible
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