Acts
Introduction

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28

Contradictions
Absurdities
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Interpretation
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Women
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Good Stuff

Acts for Skeptics

There are lots of firsts in the Book of Acts:

• The first (two) transporter operations (1:10-11, 8:39-40)

• The first speaking in tongues (2:4, 10.45-46, 19.6)

• The first Christian communists (2:44-45)

• The first prayer-caused earthquake (4:31)

• The first (three) holy prison breaks (5:19, 12.7, 16.26)

• The first Christian couple scared to death by God (5:5, 10),

• The first shadow healing (5:15-16)

• The first person blinded by Jesus (9:8-9)

• The first talking ghost (13:2)

• The first person blinded by a Christian (13:8-11)

• The first vow-induced shaved head (18:18)

• The first (and only) school mentioned in the Bible. (19:9)

• The first handkerchief healing (19:12)

• The first naked Jewish exorcists. (19:13-16)

• The first Christian book burning (19:19)

• The first boring sermon casualty (20:9)

• The first Holy Ghost-delivered girdle message (21:10-11)

• The first dust-throwing, naked, murderous Jewish mob (22:22-23)

• The first hunger strike (23:12)

• The first (and only) poisonous snake on the island of Malta (28:3-6).

Other Highlights:

• While Jesus went up to heaven, two angels (men in white) stop by to tell the disciples that Jesus will return in the same way he just left them (by beaming up/down via transporter). 1:10-11

• Whoopie! It’s Pentecost: A mighty wind comes, cloven tongues of fire sit on top of heads, everyone acts drunk and talks in languages they don't understand. 2:2-13

• Peter says that their strange behavior (speaking in tongues, etc.) was to be expected since they were living in "the last days." 2:17

• Imagine no possessions: The early Christians were the first communists. 2.44-45, 4.32-35

• Peter and God scare Ananias and his wife to death for not forking over all of the money that they made when selling their land. 5:1-10

• The sick were healed just by touching the shadow of Peter. 5.15-16

• Holy prison breaks. 5.19, 12.7-10, 16.26

• Philip made "unclean spirits" scream as they left the bodies of the people they possessed. 8:7

• The Spirit caught Philip and transported him to a city miles away. 8:39-40

• The road to Damascus (three different versions) 9.3-6, 22.6-10, 26.13-15

• Jesus blinds Paul. 9.8-9

• Peter has a dream in which God shows him "wild beasts, and creeping things, and fowls." The voice (God's?) says, "Rise, Peter: kill and eat." 10:10-13, 11.5-10

• More speaking in tongues. 10.45-46, 19.1-6

• If a husband believes, his whole family is automatically saved. 11.13-14, 16.31

• Herod killed James to please the Jews. 12.1-3

• The "angel of the Lord" killed Herod by having him "eaten of worms" because "he gave not God the glory." 12:23

• The talking ghost: "The Holy Ghost said, Separate me Barnabas and Saul for the work whereunto I have called them." 13.2

• Paul and the Holy Ghost make Elymas (the sorcerer) blind. 13:8-11

• The blasphemous, envious, murderous, Christ-killing Jews. 5.30, 7.51-52, 9.17-18, 10.39, 13.45-46, 50; 14.2-5; 17.5, 13; 18.5-6, 12; 20.19; 21.17-40; 23.12, 27; 26.21

• "It seemed good to the Holy Ghost, and to us." 15.28

• Paul circumcised Timothy. 16.1-3

• God forbids Paul to preach in Asia. 16.6-7

• Paul expels a soothsaying spirit of divination. 16.16-18

• He shaves his head as a part of a vow. 18.18

• After only two years of preaching, everyone in Asia had heard the word of the Lord! 19.10

• Sick people were cured by touching the handkerchief or apron of Paul. And the evil spirits when out of them." 19:12

• The first Christian book burning. 19:19

• Eutychus was the first casualty of many long boring sermons. 20:9

• After listening to Paul’s speech, everyone took off their clothes, threw dust in the air, and told the soldiers to kill him. 22.22-23

• The first hunger strike: "The Jews banded together, and bound themselves under a curse, saying that they would neither eat nor drink till they had killed Paul." 23.12

• Paul’s Mata snakebite story. (There are no poisonous snakes on Malta.) 28.3-6