In Leviticus 26 there is a long list of things God will do to you if you fail to follow his laws. Which of these is not on it?

If you don't obey God and follow his commandments, he will:

If ye will not hearken unto me, and will not do all these commandments, Leviticus 26:14

Force you to eat your sons and daughters,

Ye shall eat the flesh of your sons, and the flesh of your daughters shall ye eat. Leviticus 26:29

Not smell the savor of your sweet odors,

I will not smell the savour of your sweet odours. Leviticus 26:31

And force ten women to bake your bread in one oven.

And when I have broken the staff of your bread, ten women shall bake your bread in one oven, and they shall deliver you your bread again by weight: and ye shall eat, and not be satisfied.Leviticus 26:26

But he won't smite you will hemorrhoids in your secret parts

(At least he didn't say so in Leviticus 26. He saved that punishment for later, when he smote all everyone in several Philistine cities with hemorrhoids in their secret parts.)
The hand of the LORD was against the city with a very great destruction: and he smote the men of the city, both small and great, and they had emerods in their secret parts. 1 Samuel 5:9