Oh Fetch! We forgot the fricken women! God tells Lehi to send his sons back to Jerusalem again, this time to get some women--The sons return to Jerusalem and
go to Ishmael's house--God softens Ishmael's heart--Ishmael agrees to leave Jerusalem with family--Laman and Lemuel rebel, along with two of Ishmael's
daughters and two of his sons--The Spirit of the Lord forces Nephi to make another speech--The rebels tie Nephi up and leave him for
animals to eat--Nephi prays to the Lord and the Lord cuts his cords--Nephi's brothers try to kill him again--He is saved by some of Ishmael's family
who soften the hearts of Nephi's brothers--Nephi forgives his brothers and they all bow down to him.
(7:1-2) Return unto the land of Jerusalem, and bring down Ishmael and his family.
God tells Lehi to send his sons back to Jerusalem (again) to get some women.
Remember how Nephi and his brothers had to return to Jerusalem to get the brass plates? Well, now they have go back again to get some
women. Otherwise they'd have to have sex with their mom in order to populate the New World, and that's just too yucky for Mormons to even
think about. (It was OK for Adam's family back in the day, but not for Mormon Israelites in 600 BCE.)
So after Lehi made an end of prophesying about his seed, God stopped by to chat for a while. God said that he couldn't help but
notice that Lehi didn't bring any women along with him, and God didn't think it was meet for Lehi not to have some daughters to
give to his sons. What were they going to do, God asked, fuck their own mother? (I'm paraphrasing here.)
So God commanded Lehi to send his four sons back to Jerusalem (again!) to get Ishmael and his family. That way Nephi's
sons would could have sex with Ishmael's daughters instead of their mom.
(7:3-5) The Lord did soften the heart of Ishmael
So Lehi's sons went back to Jerusalem one more time. It was just another quick, uneventful, 400+ km trip. After they arrived,
the Lord softened up Ishmael's heart enough so that he agreed to leave Jerusalem with his family and go into the wilderness so that
Lehi's sons could have sex with his daughters.
(7:6-7) Laman and Lemuel, and two of the daughters of Ishmael, and the two sons of Ishmael
and their families, did rebel against us.
But then deja vu came to pass all over again. Laman and Lemuel rebelled, along with two of Ishmael's daughters and two of his sons. The whole
rebellion thing came to pass because "they were desirous to return to the land of Jerusalem."
(7:8-15) Thus the Spirit of the Lord constraineth me that I should speak.
And then Nephi gave a speech that no one should ever have to read or listen to.
being grieved for the hardness of their hearts
7:1 And now I would that ye might know, that after my father, Lehi,
had made an end of prophesying concerning his seed, it came to pass
that the Lord spake unto him again, saying that it was not meet for him, Lehi, that he
should take his family into the wilderness alone; but that his sons should take daughters to
wife, that they might raise up seed unto the Lord in the land of promise.
7:2And it came to pass that the Lord
commanded him that I, Nephi, and my brethren, should again return unto the land of
Jerusalem, and bring down Ishmael and his family into the wilderness.
7:3And it came to pass that I, Nephi, did
again, with my brethren, go forth into the wilderness to go up to Jerusalem.
7:4And it came to pass that we went up
unto the house of Ishmael, and we did gain favor in the sight of Ishmael, insomuch that we
did speak unto him the words of the Lord.
7:5And it came to pass that the Lord did
soften the heart of Ishmael, and also his household, insomuch that they took their journey
with us down into the wilderness to the tent of our father.
7:6And it came to pass that as we journeyed
in the wilderness, behold Laman and Lemuel, and two of the daughters of Ishmael, and the
two sons of Ishmael and their families, did rebel against us; yea, against me, Nephi, and
Sam, and their father, Ishmael, and his wife, and his three other daughters.
7:7And it came to pass in the which
rebellion, they were desirous to return unto the land of Jerusalem.
7:8 And now I, Nephi, being grieved for the hardness of their
hearts, therefore I spake unto them, saying, yea, even unto Laman and unto Lemuel: Behold
ye are mine elder brethren, and how is it that ye are so hard in your hearts, and so blind
in your minds, that ye have need that I, your younger brother, should speak unto you, yea,
and set an example for you?
7:9 How is it that ye have not hearkened unto the word of the
7:10 How is it that ye have forgotten that ye have seen an angel
of the Lord?
7:11 Yea, and how is it that ye have forgotten what great things
the Lord hath done for us, in delivering us out of the hands of Laban, and also that we
should obtain the record?
7:12 Yea, and how is it that ye have forgotten that the Lord is
able to do all things according to his will, for the children of men, if it so be that
they exercise faith in him? Wherefore, let us be faithful to him.
7:13 And if it so be that we are faithful to him, we shall obtain
the land of promise; and ye shall know at some future period that the word of the Lord
shall be fulfilled concerning the destruction of Jerusalem; for all things which the Lord
hath spoken concerning the destruction of Jerusalem must be fulfilled.
7:14 For behold, the Spirit of the Lord ceaseth soon to strive with
them; for behold, they have rejected the prophets, and Jeremiah have they cast into
prison. And they have sought to take away the life of my father, insomuch that they have
driven him out of the land.
7:15 Now behold, I say unto you that if ye will return unto
Jerusalem ye shall also perish with them. And now, if ye have choice, go up to the land,
and remember the words which I speak unto you, that if ye go ye will also perish; for
thus the Spirit of the Lord constraineth me that I should speak.
7:16And it came to pass that when I, Nephi,
had spoken these words unto my brethren, they were angry with me. And it
came to pass that they did lay their hands upon me, for behold, they
were exceedingly wroth, and they did bind me with cords, for they
sought to take away my life, that they might leave me in the wilderness to be devoured by
(7:16) They sought to take away my life.
After listening to Nephi's awful speech, Nephi's brothers were exceedingly wroth.
So they tied him up and left him for the animals to eat.
(7:17-18) I prayed unto the Lord, saying: O Lord....
But then Nephi prayed unto the Lord. (His prayers are worse than
his speeches.) And, just like magic, the cords were untied.
7:17 But it came to pass that I prayed unto the Lord, saying: O Lord, according to my faith which is in thee,
wilt thou deliver me from the hands of my brethren; yea, even give me strength that I may burst
these bands with which I am bound.
7:18And it came to pass that when I had
said these words, behold, the bands were loosed from off my hands and feet, and I stood
before my brethren, and I spake unto them again.
7:19And it came to pass that they were
angry with me again, and sought to lay hands upon me; but behold, one of the daughters of
Ishmael, yea, and also her mother, and one of the sons of Ishmael, did plead with my
brethren, insomuch that they did soften their hearts; and they did cease striving to take
away my life.
(7:19) They were angry with me again.
Nephi's brothers tried to lay hands on him again but he was saved by a daughter, mother, and brother of Ishmael, who softened the
hearts of Nephi's younger brothers.
(7:20-22) They did bow down before me.
Then Nephi's brothers bowed down and begged Nephi to forgive them.
And it came to pass that Nephi forgave his brothers and they returned to their father's tent in the wilderness,
where they killed and sacrificed some animals for God and began to get to know the daughters of Ishmael.
7:20And it came to pass that they were
sorrowful, because of their wickedness, insomuch that they did bow down before me, and
did plead with me that I would forgive them of the thing that they had done against
7:21And it came to pass that I did frankly
forgive them all that they had done, and I did exhort them that they would pray unto the
Lord their God for forgiveness. And it came to pass that they did
so. And after they had done praying unto the Lord we did again travel on our journey
towards the tent of our father.
7:22And it came to pass that we did come
down unto the tent of our father. And after I and my brethren and all the house of Ishmael
had come down unto the tent of my father, they did give thanks unto the Lord their God;
and they did offer sacrifice and burnt offerings unto him.